sindahadiwiguno

January 27

2012-01-27T11:22:00.006+07:00

You know I just remember that on January 27th, last year, I came to my living room, found my sisters and cried. Yes, exactly last year. And yes, I am having trouble with the fact that I remember pretty much everything so well. So my story is, I cried last night. Not so sure why, there are two possibilities; 1) I just watched The Descendants, or 2) I realized it's been a year and I think I'm the only person in this world who can't let things go easily—no, it's not that I still want things back—ew, please don't. I'm just mad by the fact that it seems like all my friends move on so easily and why people do and why I don't—I mean, I moved on of course, I just haven't forgotten, big time, like, though I saw it coming, it still hurts. Like I'm just so angry and... I don't know, yeah I know I think too much. All my friends are like, "How can you not date anyone yet?" and I'm like, "How can you not feel tired?", and they're like, "Drop it, S." and I'm like, "Oh, I'd love to—would kill for that, but how???"

Is it just me?

I TEACH

2012-01-14T21:11:00.009+07:00

Hahaha, I know that maybe none of my friends is gonna believe this, but I did! I teach English literature for 20 6th grade students! And I can't believe I got so excited about that. That was so so much fun. I think I fell in love with my students hehehe :~)

(Click the picture for bigger size)

The Deer in the Headlights

2012-01-08T23:22:00.010+07:00

It's officially been a year. And you might have me believing I don't always have to be alone... I think I should thank you for that. Thank you.

Chapter 2012, page 1 of 366

2012-01-01T23:23:00.005+07:00

It feels so strange looking down at the calendar on a rainy quite Sunday and seeing '1st of January, 2012' as the actual date. 2011. It has been a rough exhausting year I can't even tell how awful this year has treated me. And based on the yearly horoscope forecast I read on magazine, 2012 would be even worse for Sagittarians. Well, thankyouverymuch, that is so helping. But anyway, happy new year, we survive by remembering, but sometimes, we survive by forgetting, that's what they say. Good luck!

Us four.

2011-12-23T20:44:00.005+07:00

Just got back from lunch with Mela, Mamet, and Gema. Yup, them again! My 11th grade 'team tempur'. That was such a sweet and super fun reunion. I miss us four, it's been 3 years since the last time we hung out together—Gema moved to Bandung, Mamet to Melbourne, but surprisingly, nothing's changed about us being together, like, we've only been sharing stories through skype and it felt like so many things happened and changed, but when we had lunch today, everything was like 3 years ago. And you know what, that was actually the very first time we lunch at mall.

Blair Waldorf: "What if I never get over Chuck?"

2011-12-23T08:12:00.008+07:00

You thought you were over it. You thought you were far enough from yesterday. But it takes just one second to blow reality right back in your face, just by accidentally looking at it, or heard it, for one time, one second—boom, yesterday is now again.

You know what makes me addicted to watch Gossip Girl? Is that it gets me. Every word every line every moment, there's always time when I say, "This is the exact thing that happened to me." Then I don't feel that alone anymore, like, well, somebody having the same hard time like me. I don't know when is it going to be ended—I hope not forever, but tonight—right now, I really need to sleep and how I wish I could just skip all the thoughts. This is the worst pain ever.

P.S I (honestly) don't feel really okay writing down things like this. However, this is one of my way to feel better. So.

This december 13th

2011-12-15T20:00:00.010+07:00

Yesterday was basically just like another day, only, all the lovely people came to see me, including my brother. Yes, just in case you're wondering who's that boy in the brown uniform, that's my new brother, Frendy. So, starting with surprise from my two sisters bringing oreo & blueberry with cream cheese cupcakes, then birthday lunch with my mother and lil sister at my most favorite restaurant eating my most favorite food: mother's cook caesar salad. At night I went to Mela's and she surprised me with my 2 favorite cupcakes: red velvet and oreo! The rest... I spent the last hours of my birthday sitting at my favorite coffee shop, sipping my favorite macchiato, with my favorite friend. Simple and mature, right? Hahaha oh how I love birthdays :)

I'm twenty

2011-12-14T00:24:00.008+07:00

I have a brother.

2011-12-05T10:14:00.002+07:00

No, it's not that brother-friends thingy. It's brother-brother. Literally. I have a brother now. Not that my mother just gave a birth, but my mom just adopted a 20 years old boy that now become my brother. I'm not yet sharing his picture now since my friends so crazy about any boys around me, I mean like, since I'm not dating anyone, they've been trying to hook me up with any boys they know. Seriously. So I don't know how many times they ask, "Is that your new boyfriend?" The thing is, I have a brother, I love to say it, I can say it thousand times cause my whole life it's always been 'sisters'.

p.s I'm trying to hook mela up with him. They just met yesterday :p

Hello again, December.

2011-12-05T09:57:00.004+07:00

Isn't that crazy how you keep thinking that something just happened like 2 months ago in fact that it's actually been a year? Like, how feeling's moving super slowly. I'm worried.

Theory of love.

2011-09-30T07:46:00.007+07:00

"Genuine love, of course, can be healthy, growth-producing experience; but the desperare need love provides a fertile ground for the development of neuroses." (Theories of Personality 7th ed., page 166-167, 2009)

It feels good to finally write again. I'm enjoying my life, I'm enjoying all the blessed times, and I'm trying to enjoy the pains ;) Well, until now, there's not much I could write, though I really want to write something. Writing is pretty much like a therapy for me, but what can I do, I'm stuck. But hey, anyway, by this morning, my Dad is officially moving to Jakarta again! I'll be leaving my & mela's apartment for a while, living with my Dad and Mom in Kuningan instead, and Mela is moving to her house in Cikeas permanently. Um..., well, that's all.

How time flies.

2011-08-15T00:35:00.005+07:00

Captured by Wiyarto Hadiwiguno

Yes, I've mentioned that thing in my previous post, which, makes me more realized that me and my sisters are all big girls. My little sister turned 17 yesterday and my big sister just got her first real job couple days ago. I feel like we're just graduated from something, from our childhood I guess. My sisters are pretty much my lifetime partners. We went from no-day-without-catfight to nights-with-sharing-stories, from baby lotion to mascara, from Tom and Jerry to Dirty Sexy Money, from Billabong to Biyan.

Ah, good times.

Maybe some years later, we'll go from break up stories to the wedding plans, from introducing new boyfriend to bachelorette party, from one bed to own houses. Hell yeah. How time flies, right sist? Happy birthday again, Adek. Many congratulations and best of luck, Mbara. You two are amazing and I really am a proud sister.

Love you, Monsters!

Always Sindut.

August 14th

2011-08-15T00:22:00.003+07:00

Ah..., how time flies. My little girl, my baby sister, is now no longer a baby. She just turned 17 today and got a surprise. She was surprised—thank God!—especially with the Pique things ;) I wish you the best for life, Adek. Happy birthday!

Welcome back, heart.

2011-07-30T00:39:00.007+07:00

I remember I once prayed to God in front of Ka'Bah few months ago. I said, "Dear Allah, apapun yang terjadi nantinya, saya cuma minta tolong jaga hati saya, tolong dengan sangat jauhkan segala macam jenis sakit hati karna saya nggak yakin saya bisa lebih sakit hati lagi. If there is something in me that hurts right now, it's this heart."

And boom. The answer, back then, is time. It is, again, just a matter of time. I'm not saying, I'm already perfectly fine. But it's better. I saw it, I saw him tonight. And I think this heart makes it through. ;-)

July

2011-07-01T23:21:00.004+07:00

Okay. So, it's July already.

I can't actually believe that I'm still alive. I had a major heartbroken last January—I hate to say it, it sounds dramatic. But you know what's insane? I don't even realize that it has been torturing me for almost 7 months. Yes, I said it. Finally. After avoided to talk about it for 7 months, to everyone. It still feels like just happened yesterday, you know...

If I can quote someone, that would be Blair Waldrof, "They said it's a broken heart, but I hurt in my whole body."

I don't wish so much, July—I don't think you can do magic either—but if I can make a wish, I want to be happy, normally happy.

Graduation

2011-06-30T20:03:00.005+07:00

Congratulations Ria Villafa Hadiwiguno, S. Sos. We're so beyond proud of you :)

10 days of life

2011-05-20T11:06:00.006+07:00

this is a love at the first sight.

Just had the best 10 days of my life. An amazing trip, the inspiring one, and sure becomes my favorite after all. I wish I could go back there again someday, just like what I wished.

delightful night

2011-03-05T19:41:00.013+07:00

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful night. I thank you so much for everything; for the foods, the games, the laughs, and along sleeps ;) Surely looking forward for the other nights. Love you.

Why I love Adam

2011-02-24T23:34:00.007+07:00

Have you watched this movie? I watched it on Valentine's Day. Sweet. Super.

Sebenernya, yang bikin sweet itu adalah how Adam treats Emma. Ah, those are killing. Kayaknya Ashton Kutcher jadi spesialis film Valentine's Day gitu yah. Remember Valentine's Day movie on Valentine's Day 2010?

So, anyway, these are the reasons why I love Adam:

1. Adam brings Emma a box of cupcakes when Emma gets period. You know, when a girl gets period, chocolates, cupcakes, and candies are her very best friend.
2. Adam cooks a chicken soup for Emma, also when Emma gets period. He says, "What? Chicken Soup makes your tummy better. No?" My tummy hurts like hell when I get period, but nobody makes soup for me. Repeat, no fucking body.
3. Still, when Emma gets period—God, Adam could even make PMS becomes something sweet— Emma yells at Adam, and he's just like okay and just does what she wants him to does.
4. THE PERIOD PLAYLIST
5. The way Adam says, "I'm warning you, if you take one step closer, I'm never letting you go." Hell yeah.
6. THAT CARROTS!!!! So, Emma says, "No flowers on the date." And you know what, Adam brings a bouquet of carrots. and says, "You said no flowers. So." I was like, o' my God that's so sweet I could kill someone!!!

Time

2011-02-23T03:40:00.006+07:00

Can anybody tell me that I'll be alright? Cause the person who used to tell me that, is the one who makes me not.

Anyway, who doesn't want a time machine? Just to see whether you're fine or or not in the future?

I ALWAYS want to have one. It's pathetic, like, even, when I just eat something, I wish I had a time machine, turn back time, 5 or 10 minutes back, and did not eat. When I was young, I always want to fast forward the time, well, I still want to do that But now, most of time, I just want to be back to December 2010. Or May 2010, Or July 2007, or even, December 1991.

Sometimes, I think that maybe if I want something—which is back to December—that bad and think about it all the time, God will send me back to December. Like, in the movie, you know "17 Again" maybe? Or "Heroes"

Pathetic. I know.

"We all have our time machines. Some take us back, they're called memories. Some take us forward, they're called dreams." —Jeremy Irons

I don't think so.

Some take us back called regrets. And some take us forward called tired-of-life-s.

But I should stop. The time machine still doesn't exist. No matter how much I want it, it won't exist. Now just wait and watch. And feel.

Cause future is uncertain. And that's for certain.

Dear blog,

2011-02-15T08:54:00.005+07:00

It's been like years since my latest post. I have no words. I can't mystically conjure them. Letters are futile without the emotion through which they are composed. Like, there is nothing, but,

Everything just lingers a fucking inch past my finger tips and leaves me in complete chaos, just suspended in confusion. Nothing but numb confusion. I don’t want your clues, I don’t want your hints, I need the flat line truth, I need it to be told mercilessly, without hesitation and without a second thought. Do anything, just don’t leave me to suffocate. I need to be told selfishly. Why can I never get it. Why can I never give myself closure even when it’s placed right in the palm of my hands? Do you want me to leave, do you want me to stay? Do you, or don't you? 'Cause you know what, I've never been fine since the last month, for Godsake, like, sometimes, I just want to give up, but sometimes, I want to keep fight. Like, I'm having a Somatization Disorders, or Somatoform Pain Disorders, or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorders, or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorders, I don't know. I tried to diagnose myself, from my psychology books. But they didn't help.

I can't feel, and thus, I can't write.

I can not even breath.

2011-02-12T23:41:00.004+07:00

i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you i miss you i...

...miss you. And it doesn't feel good. I need help. Please?

I tell you this is life.

2011-01-21T10:38:00.006+07:00

Maybe, I just stop trying.
Maybe, I just don't know what to do.
Maybe, I just finally give up.
Maybe, I just trust destiny now.

Or maybe, I'm just tired.
And, confusing.

But this is life, love.
You can't run from problems. You need to fix each one of them.
Including me.

Fact number one → I HATE broken promises.

2011-01-15T22:55:00.008+07:00

Don't you know, boy, when you promise a date with me, it blows me away. And I, automatically, make a plan; what I'm gonna wear, what I'm gonna speak, what I'm gonna do, those are just coming outta my mind days before the date.

And don't you know, boy, what's the worst feeling ever? Knowing the date is canceled in the last minutes. I repeat, last-fucking-minutes.

Could you guys just please―PLEASE― don't promise anything, don't say anything, or don't set up anything if you're going to ruin it? It's not that I want a date so bad, it's just, when all my imaginations about the date is ruined by the fact that it's canceled, it's frustrating.

I'd rather know nothing. Seriously.

P.S I wish you have a bad night tonight. And the traffic jam will fuck you up. And your favorite soccer team lose. Amen.

2011; Chapter One

2011-01-02T18:39:00.006+07:00

Just got back from new year holiday. It was quite fun. Well, happy new year people. Another 3,153,600 seconds of growing up, again, right? Hahaha. Nah... I wish it's gonna be best year in your life, in our life.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Everything is gonna be fine.

Semifinal AFF 2010; Indonesia vs Philippines

2010-12-20T08:57:00.008+07:00

SO, I WATCHED INDONESIA AGAINST PHILIPPINES LIVE IN GELORA BUNG KARNO SENAYAN.

Hahaha, hebring ya bo. Abis seru banget sih, the stadium is huge! That was the first time I ever watched soccer live, also the first time I ever visited GBK. Most of people wore red top and that super big stadium was full! That was amazing, ngeliat satu stadion penuh pendukung indonesia dan semuanya semangat! Serunya lagi tuh kalo bola udah deket gawang lawan, penonton-penonton pasti berdiri, kalo nggak jadi masuk, duduk lagi. Jadi bolak-balik duduk berdiri, capek sih, tapi seru.

Sadly, pas finalnya nanti gue udah di Palembang. Tapi nggak pa-pa juga sih, biar seru, I don't want to watch any game live in GBK lagi, capeknya maksimum, macetnya juara, dan pemain bolanya keliatan keciiil aja.

19th birthday

2010-12-14T19:44:00.005+07:00

Hi there everyone!
I just turned 19 tomorrow and that was amazing day. I thought I'd be hating birthdays since it's not my 17th birthday again―I hate adults. But knowing that so many people remember my day and got so many birthday surprises, wishes, and greetings, I feel so so so blessed.

First birthday surprise came from Mbak Ail, Mbak Ria, dan Adek.

And I got this cute flash disk. Agak aneh sih kok gue dikasih buzz lighter. Pas gue tanya "Lah kenapa buka eeyore?" Eh.... malah dikatain ngga tau diri -_-

Second birthday suprise came from my super sweet girlfriends Mela, Dwi, Acid, Arin, Eji, Tika, dan pacarnya Tika.

Surprise ketiga dari Denis, Echa, Arli, Hana, Iman, Kopet, Harbas

They also say happy birthday. Sayangnya Nathan, Cassey, Boom, Sam, and Zeez yang lagi pada dirumah waktu fotoini diambil nggak bisa ikutan ngasih ucapan selama ulang tahun untuk mamahnya.

Ah yeah, we really need to talk about the gifts hehehe. I got an Instax mini 7S and it's white!!! (Tadinya Denis mau beliin yang pink-putih, unfortunately lagi nggak ready stock, but you know what, I love white more!) Thank you yah, Nyis. I'll capture every important moment in my life :) And... I got an eeyore doll from my sweet friends in college, and it's now named Dusty because it has a dusty color, quite different than the other eeyore. AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH! I CAN'T THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH!

Terima kasih yah untuk kejutan, kado, dan doa-doanya, kalian semua baik-baik sekali =)

Kabillion Million Jillion Kisses,

Happiest birthday girl <;-)

Photos from his camera

2010-12-06T22:46:00.007+07:00

Denis, Sinda, Mba Wi
Iman, Aziz, Denis

Sinda, Mela, Anggo, Arli, Echa, Cemong

Temen-temen kuliahnya Denis

Kakak-kakak kelasnya Denis di KI

Tuan Putri Mela dan Sinda

Ini nggak penting, tapi..... lucu kan?
Jadi penting

Happy birthday, Dear You.

2010-12-05T22:45:00.006+07:00

So, today is my baby's birthday. Nggak kayak tahun lalu yang ngasih kejutan pagi-pagi buta, tahun ini surprise-nya pas dinner time. Agak ribet sih, secara Denis itu tipe banyak mau jadi bingung mau ngasih kado yang mana, dan dia juga tipe ge-er-an yang tau banget bakal dikasih kejutan. Sebenernya yang sulit itu ngumpulin temen-temen SMA-nya. Banyak yang nggak bisa, rata-rata yang kuliah di luar Jakarta nggak bisa dateng.

Jadi rencananya itu, Papa, Mamah, dan Kakaknya Denis mau ngajakin birthday dinner biasa, tapi ntar ada gue, temen-temen SMA, dan temen-temen kuliahnya Denis udahada di tempat buat ngasih surprise. Clasic, I know

Tapi bukan Denis namanya kalo nggak ngulah dan bikin orang drop, pas kita semua udah nyampe PIM dan siap-siap untuk ngasih surprise, kakaknya Denis bbm kalau dia males pergi. "Si Denis nggak mau bangun dari kasur katanya mager."

Sumpah rasanya pengen bakar kamarnya Denis. Tapi untungnya setelah Papanya Denis sok-sok ngambek Denis ikut ke Pim dan acaranya berjalan sesuai rencana :)

The birthday cupcakes.

Ini temen-temen SMA kita, foto temen-temen kuliahnya nggak ada di kamera gue.

Again,
Happy birthday, Nyis. Semoga seneng yah, plus, awet sama pacarnya yang cantik itu.

Hearts,
Tuan Putri :p

Nov 28th, 30 minutes before 00.00

2010-11-29T18:40:00.001+07:00

We talked about what is just happening to our close friends' relationships lately. They love each other, but they also hurt each other. They need each other, but they also push each other away.

I don't say that my relationship always fine. No. War is necessary, anyway ;p― but as you maybe can see, my boyfriend sucks in romantic things. He rarely says sweet things, he has no twitter to expresses what he feels, he has no blog to tell what he feels about me, and he almost never talk about our relationship to his friend. Just, "Hey, this is Sinda, my girlfriend."

Not like the other boys who talk about his girlfriend on twitter. Tweet it every time they get fight or just simply showing people how he loves his girlfriend. But the more I compare it, the more I realized that I'm lucky enough for having him. So, I said thanks to him last night.

And he was like, "For what?"
"For make me... not being like the other girls. Not one of those who hurt tonight. Or lately."

He laughed. Then said, "I'm grateful that you are mine."

Yeay.
Happy 13th month, thanks for accompanied me watching Rapunzel today.

Nov

2010-11-28T17:56:00.003+07:00

Hi, been so long since my last post. I was super busy with the mid term things, the first time I really study for mid term, actually. When I were in high school, mid terms meant 'can go home earlier'.

So... I really don't know what to write, honestly, but I just opened my formspring and someone ask me to write about my mom, and let's try.

First of all, she rocks.
We share almost everything, clothes, shoes, bags, make up. One thing about that you have to know is that I am so wanting to be exactly like her. Um, no, not the weight. She has a really good sense of fashion. Super classy, timeless, fab. When I was kid, she bought me new earrings every week, new bangles, necklace, everything. She even bought me Gadis magazine when I was still in elementary.

Ah, there's one funny thing about her every time she wants to buy something like bags, shoes, anything. She always say, "Ini ibu beli kan ujung-ujung nanti ke kamu." Alibi. Well, let me make a list about her.
Um, one, she loves Jcool, she can eat sharing cup alone.
Two, her favorite TV show is Hawaii Five-O
Three, she hates sinetron Indonesia.
Four, she hates gadget
Five, there are just two computer games that she can play, Solitaire and Spider Solitaire.
Six, she dreams only once a year. No kidding, ibu gue jarang banget mimpi pas bobo
Seven, she always falls asleep in the middle of movie in cinema. ALWAYS
Eight, everytime she looks at a snake, she says, "Ih kulitnya pasti bagus dibikin tas."
Nine, Aigner = her life
Ten, she has twitter that just made for her daughter, kadang suka nanggepin nggak jelas.
Eleven, SHE ROCKS, KAY, ENOUGH SAY.

Ah yeah, tomorrow is my 13th month of being with Denis and exactly next week, he'll be 19. So, meet me next week ;-)

RIP Bobo

2010-11-11T10:41:00.005+07:00

I like dogs― God, no I love them! Tapi biasanya butuh beberapa saat untuk pendekatan sama anjing tertentu sebelum akhirnya gue bersedia meluk-meluk mereka. I don't really like fur― lebih tepatnya, gue punya semacam paranoid akan debu -_-

So this is Bobo, my cousin's dog. The only dog in my family. I don't know why the tradition of having dogs in my family gone. My grandfather always gave his childrend dog, my mother's dog was Asta, a bulldog, my granpha's was Aria Van Brahmaputra― a Golden Retriever, and my grandma's was Frea, means a queen of beauty. Kata ibu gue, Asta always accompanied her sleep every night, tapi nggak tau kenapa, pas punya anak, Ibu gue nggak ngebolehin kita-kita pelihara anjing (but then after I watched Marley and Me I swear to God I will never want a dog in my life cause I know I could never handle a death sadness), and that's why I was so excited about Bobo, since 6 years go.

The night when Bobo died, last night actually, Mba Ail called me and she even can't barely spoke! I thought she got a heart attack or something, no kidding. And here is what my cousin wrote after she heard that Bobo was gone:

Bobo was belong to a friend. Unlike Koko, her brother, she was an active and friendly dog. I used to borrow her, took her for a short walk, till she couldn't stand and just lay down in our porch. That day, I accompanied by ibu Asri, decided to took her to Vet. As a student, it took me a fortune to took her to the vet. The Vet was pregnant and she was really upset when she found out that the dog was in bad condition. She got 10 injections and can only have beef as her meal. I never return her to the original owner since. She stayed with me, she sleeps with me, she tastes my food, she bites me for fun, she fuck my leg and she'll destroy my pants everytime she misses me.

Anyway she survives, unlike her brother Koko who died few days after. Till this week, she suffered from infection which cause her vomiting and left her dehydration. The doctor visited her and she got intravena. 6 shots and she remained calm, surrender. Two hours after, she screamed, she screamed like she was in pain *oh yeah i heard that through the phone and don't ask how sad it was*, my mom rub her, and there, in front of my mom, she died. Leaving us, after the faboulous year, the lovely moments

I will miss her voice when she wants meatball, I will miss her paw on my lap when she beg for my food. I won't chase her for another bath, I won't see her chasing cat again, I won't have her on my bed again, I won't have her waking me up for a walk again.

She was my baby girl, she was my soulmate, she was my everything.
To all the dog owner, please cherish every moment with your dog, because loosing a dog will make you half dead..
―Ailsa Amila

See, I really could never ever handle thing like this. But, I really did love you Bobo, I still do. I wish you rest in peace.

Tangled.

2010-11-01T08:42:00.006+07:00

Welcome, November. Please ease me. It's getting closer to 2011. Finally. And it's getting so much closer to Tangled Movie a.k.a Rapunzel The Movie. Yeay.

So why do I want to watch it so bad?
When I was in elementary school, my hair was like... super long! (I won't tell you how long because you'll think that my parents was so mean― and old school) I―as the owner of that super long hair― hated it. I mean, that was so freak to having hair that long. But, the only thing that made me loved my hair that time was only Rapunzel :-) She is super beautiful with that super-long-yet-freak hair.

―Oh! And on that time, Rapunzel was still just a Barbie. So, I can't wait to see The 2010 Rapunzel.

Doo-Wops & Hooligans

2010-10-31T10:02:00.006+07:00

Anybody got this album already? Lemme know where to buy it, can ya? I've been looking for it these weeks tapi belum ada dimana-mana. Not even Aksara. I love him― (I heard he's dating someone *heart breaks into a kabillionmillionjillion pieces*) I love all singers that singing songs with magical lyrics like him― and Taylor Swift of course haha. I’m a big fan of songs like ‘Glory Of Love’ and ‘Endless Love’ ―songs that go straight to the point. I definetely judge song from the lyric ;-) So, again, let me know if you've bought or seen this, kay?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anyway, I watched Life as We Know It last night with Denis after got recommend from Meyo. Funny film. The best thing about this film is... Josh Duhamel. God he's handsome.

One year old.

2010-10-29T23:38:00.004+07:00

Terima kasih untuk hari ini dan 365 hari yang lain yah, Nyis.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jumat, 29 Oktober 2010
Hari ini biasa aja kayak hari lainnya. Nemenin Denis futsal, dinner, ketawa-ketiri, gitu-gitu aja. Tapi yang bikin beda soalnya hari ini Denis nurut dan ngalah banget. Bahkan lebih ngalah daripada pas kalau gue lagi dapet. Hihi. Trus kalau biasanya paling males dengerin obsesi gue akan lagu-lagu romantis, hari ini beda.

Sinda: Nyis kamu bisa main piano kan?
Denis: Bisa...
Sinda: Main depan aku dong.
Denis: Mainin lagu apa *biasanya jawab 'Ah, males. Ngapain?'*
Sinda: Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars.
Denis: Oh, yang "Her eyes... her eyes..." itu yah?
Sinda: Iya! *takjub ternyata biar biasanya pura-pura nggak dengerin pas gue teriak-teriak nyanyiin lagu ini di mobil, ternyata diem-diem Denis hafal. Biar cuma nyebut her eyes her eyes doang*
Denis: Susah, Sind... Nge-beat gitu.
Sinda: Enggak! Pas bagian reff-nya aja. Kayak yang di video clip-nya.
Denis: ....

Tulisan gue hari ini agak berantakan dan random yah? Tapi gimana dong abisnya bingung mau nulis apa lagi. Ya uds yah bobok dulu besok kuliah. Dadah...

2010-10-25T21:12:00.003+07:00

This is actually like weeks ago, tapi pengen aja post disini supaya tetep inget.

Me, Mba De, Sheila.

So I attended JRL with Sheila (Denis' cousin), Mbak De (Denis' sister), Subhan (MbaDe's boyfriend), Aji, Bagoes (Denis' friends)

I'm so not a fan of rock music, really. I honesty wish that someone buy me David Foster tix (SERIOUSLY I WANT IT SO BAD BUT I DON'T WANT TO PAY 1 MILLION FOR SITTING AT THE REARMOST OF THE BUILDING)

Motif gue dateng ke JRL karna... diajak aja sama Denis. Trus pengen main sama Sheila soalnya terakhir ketemu pas piala dunia :-( Okay, the funny story is, I finally know how mau pingsan feels like. Jadi tuh, karna itu penuh sesek banget yah, ntar kenapa tiba-tiba aja gue kleyengan trus keringet dingin, trus pengen muntah (like I always do). Trus Denis yang emang jagain gue dari belakang nyadar gitu tiba-tiba badan gue keringetan trus gue di tarik ke pinggir kerumunan.

And I wasn't the only one who wanted to faint, ternyata Mbak De juga, jadi deh Denis sama Subhan nungguin kita berdua and luckly pas banget Dashboard Confessional-nya abis. Abis itu cari makan. Abis itu muter-muter. Abis itu udah deh, bobok.

Spotted!

2010-10-24T08:19:00.005+07:00

Dear god. Will someone please hurry up and just give this bitch an award that says,

"Congrats, Palermo, you made it, you are officially part of the ”the women-who-set-up-unrealistic-expectations-for-the-rest-of-womankind” club, alongside the likes of Audrey Hepburn, Bridgette Bardot and Jane Fonder."

That’s got to be her life goal, right? Quick! Before the woman falls off her heels and trips over her Birkin Bag and a hair falls out of place!

The College Life

2010-10-20T11:29:00.007+07:00

Those who say that assignment in college bitch is totally right. Here my assignments for only one semester, and this is only for one class, General Psychology.

Is it hard?
Yes, and no.

I personally thank to my God that my college give a brilliant method of teaching. These all assignment, like I said, for the whole 1 semester but no deadline. Jadi, buat yang mau ngerjain tugasnya langsung ngebut semua, boleh, buat yang nunda atau bahkan nggak ngerjain, boleh. You could see that I've done 5 assignments for General Psychology. (Also 2 for Biopsychology class, 2 for Introduction to Research Methods Class and zero for Bahasa for Psychology Class)

Jadi sistimnya begini, di Binus, nggak ada paksaan mau mengerjakan tugas atau tidak. Di Binus juga, dosen yang menentukan seberapa persen tugas berpengaruh pada nilai, it's usually written on the info coloum. Being a Binusian (panggilan untuk mereka yang belajar di Binus) is all about being in front of the computer, keeping track of Binus Maya (situs untuk para Binusian dalam membantu proses belajar mereka) all the time. Some teachers menerapkan sistim "Siapa yang aktif di forum akan mendapat nilai tambahan". Jadi, dosen-dosennya tuh suka iseng ngasih tugas dalam forum yang kadan kita dikasih deadline 10 hari atau bahkan 5 menit.

Seru?
Yes, and no.

But I really am enjoying these all. Kadang sangat membantu masalah mati gaya yang sering gue alami di apartment bareng Mela. Daripada bengong dan beralih ke makanan, mending nyicil tugas, siapa tau akhir semester udah plong karna tugas-tugas udah selesai *dan abis itu kembali mati gaya*. And I have a bunch of wonderful friends, alhamdulillah, all my friends baik, baik banget malah. Nope, not best friends, just friend. I kindly have traumatic about this things *calon psycholgist kok punya traumatic*

Enaknya di Binus lagi (nggak bermaksud untuk promosi, really), udah ada bimbingan untuk skripsi for the very first semester (plus, dosen yang ngajar ganteng gela), itu namanya Introduction to Research Methods class, jadi kita udah diajarin nulis sejak awal supaya nantinya nggak mentok atau bahkan nggak bisa nulis, secara kan psikologi banyak penelitian yang akhirnya harus dibentuk ke karya ilmiah. Binus tuh kayak sangat menuntut muridnya untuk lulus tepat waktu, I must say, it mostly like high school. Kita bener-bener dituntut lulus 4 tahun, jadi kemampuan menulis itu di hajar abis. Sistemnya juga sebenernya agak nyeleneh, disini kita nggak bisa milih mata kuliah, semuanya udah dipaketin sampe lulus nanti. Kita nggak punya pelajaran Kewarganegaraan, Agama, atau lainnya itu, semuanya fokus dijurusan. Sebagai gantinya, kita punya Employability and Entrepreneurial Skills Enhancement Class yang masuk dijadwal tapi SKS-nya 0, dodol emang. Ada lagi Self Development Class, SKS-nya 2, itu belajar tetang dunia kerja gitu. Jadi bener-bener harus lulus tepat waktu dan dapet kerja. Itu prinsipnya.

Bawel yah gue, abisnya this new college life is totally different sih jadi bener-bener the whole new story. But I guess these are it, I must come back to my assignments, Biopsychology, 2 more to go; Evolution and Genetics.

Excited?
Yes, and no.

:p,
Sinda.

Room Sweet Room

2010-10-15T15:19:00.008+07:00

As I promise, here the video about my and Mela's new place. Hope you like the place as much as we do.

Anyway, pintu toiletnya sekarang sudah nggak begitu. Dengan mengorbankan 1 bundel double tip, sekarang pintu kamar mandi jadi begini,

Wish us a very good luck for doing anything here.
With a lot love,
Sinda, and Mela.

2010 so far.

2010-10-11T09:04:00.007+07:00

2010 has been taking everything I've imagined before about my future. I plan everything― future college, future husband's job, future kids' names, future wedding theme, future privilege shoes designer, and more. And 2010 just taught me that there's no "Things I've planned before will be just dreams" before you die.

One of my oldest friend I've ever had, Astrid Bruell, told me, "You're the one who crates the list of your future. And you're the one too who thinks that you destroy your future by doing things you didn't plan before. You're so young. So young, trust me. When you turn 20 all your friends won't talk about things you talking about now. And you'll meet people that maybe bad. You'll change. You'll be hurt. Many times."

And when I heard that, I was like, okay, I'm going 19 this December, and I've lost so many things. I've been hurt so many times. And I'll get hurt even more? Like, a lot? Kay then I don't wanna turn 20.

But if I didn't, where will be I going to? I don't want to die young.
Full stop.

But I think and I think again (because I don't want to die young which means I should turn 20 which means I'll get hurt more than I've already got) all I will through in maybe 5 years later, will (finally!!) bring me to the one I'll marry, which is NOT who I imagine now. So, I guess my plan now is just... *drumsrolling* to not making any plan but going with the flow. Wish me a good luck :D

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
P.S To all my dearest friends who read this random blog, sorry that I rarely post something lately. I HAVEN'T HAD AN INTERNET PROVIDER IN MY NEW APARTMENT *calling daddy*. I actually made a video with Mela about our apartment but I―stupidly― left my laptop in my apartment :D So hang in there, I'll be back soon with the video. Keep watching. XXXXX!

Move away.

2010-09-20T09:44:00.003+07:00

Hi, happy Monday. So happy to tell you that I won't hate Monday again! I just study 3 days a week; Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. I really don't mind that I still have to study in Saturday, rather than Monday.

Oh and, I just found my new apartment. Actually, it's mine and Mela's! We're gonna staying at D'Lofts Apartment room number.... (OK, I guess it's private :p) So now, I'm desperately open every website about twin room. Promise to post about the room soon after we finish the decor. We're gonna make this place lovely. Amen.

Dear happiness,

2010-09-19T23:05:00.000+07:00

I finally see you again. Please stay forever this time. You don't have to that big, I just need a peacefulness. Thank you, God.

Love,
Your home.

Sept 17th

2010-09-17T20:35:00.006+07:00

I see your face in my mind as I drive away. I think none of us thought it was gonna end this way. I know, people are people and sometimes we change our minds. But it's killing me to see you go after all this time. Music starts playing like the end of a sad movie. It's the kinda ending I really didn't wanna see. Because that was tragedy and it will only bring us down. Now I don't know what to be without you around.

And we know it's never simple. Never easy. Never a clean break. No one there to saved me. Still no one here to save me. You were the only thing I knew like the back of my hand. And I can't breathe without you, but I had to.

Never want this, never want to see you hurt. Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve. But people are people and sometimes it doesn't work out. Nothing I said was gonna save us from the fall out. It's 2 a.m., feeling like I just lost a friend. Hope you know it's never been easy for me.

Hi, happy birthday. And sorry, I miss you.

2010-09-15T19:43:00.000+07:00

I must say, this is my worst Ramadhan ever. Ntah kenapa rasanya makin kesini suasana Ramadhan makin nggak berasa dan bikin atmosfir untuk bikin pahala sebanyak-banyaknya hilang.

Is it just me?

I gotta be honest with you, I did NOT do Solat Taraweh at all! Sebenernya ini bukan tahun pertama nggak taraweh sama sekali sih, cuma ini tahun pertama mulai ngeremehin Ramadhan. And I feel super regret. Bukan masalah dosa, puasa alhamdulillah nggak ada yang bolong kecuali pas mestruasi, dosa juga nggak banyak yang dibikin sengaja, cuma nggak tau kenapa, rasanya nggak manfaatin Ramadhan banget aja. Semoga Allah mengundang gue kembali ke Ramadhan tahun depan dengan anggota keluarga dan teman-teman yang lengkap. Amin =)

Anyway, biarpun Ramadhannya nggak begitu lancar, perayaan Idul Fitrinya seru. I finally did Open House again. So since I was 10 years old, bokap udah mulai ngadain Open House where like ALL the people come to my house. Tapi kira-kira sejak 4 tahun terakhir, bokap cuma ngadain Open House 1 kali doang pas jadi Komandan Brigif di Kediri. Open house-nya 2 hari, hari pertama untuk orang-orang Korem, hari kedua untuk pasukan-pasukan bokap yang di luar daerah Palembang. SUPERCAPEK. Apalagi dapet tugas bagi-bagiin duit buat semua anak kecil yang dateng ke rumah. Tapi tetep seru. Apalagi kenal yang namanya Amel.

Lucu banget kan? I was babysitting her for 2 days =)

Udah cuma itu doang yang bisa dibagi, ini baru mau baca-baca postingan kalian-kalian semua selama lebaran abis itu lanjut ngecheck formspring. Ayo, ayo, yang nggak ada kerjaan nanya yuk ;)

Love,

Hi Bloggie,

2010-09-09T10:20:00.000+07:00

I'm in Palembang right now. Bokap tetep nggak bisa ninggalin Palembang karna harus open-house selama dua hari jadilah lebaran kali ini di Palembang :-)

Anyway, mungkin some of you ada yang liat that I wrote "Sept 2th" di post yang sekarang "Sept 2nd". Yes, it was typo. Thank you for not complaining that in formspring.me. Haha

And one more thing, gue memohon maaf lahir batin untuk semua kesalahan yang disengaja ataupun tidak kepada semua kalian yah. Semuanya. Semoga ibadah puasa selama sebulan diterima dan kita bisa ketemu Ramadhan tahun depan. God bless us.

Sept 2nd

2010-09-02T00:39:00.008+07:00

Birthday of my first sister!!! So we just made a surprise party and she was all surprised! Nggak tau juga sih kalo ternyata cuma pura-pura kaget. But anyway, happy birthday, sister! Ditunggu birthday dinner-nya!

Ini birthday cake keduanya dari Bintang.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN MBAK RA!

Dear happiness..

2010-08-30T00:17:00.009+07:00

Letter day 001
Dear happiness,
so, I haven't seen you in a while.
―um, correction, I haven't seen you in a long time.
Is that my fault? My doctor said it probably is. He said I should have more fun sometimes. He's a little strange but he meant well.

Yours,
Someone lost.

Letter day 002
Dear happiness,
I get a little scared sometimes,
―um, correction, I'm scared, all the time. Right now.
Please visit me. Maybe you think I'm not worth it―maybe there's people out there that appreciate you more. But no, I'm the biggest fan of you, right now

Yours,
Someone worth to be visited.

Letter day 003
Dear happiness,
a bad dream told me you don't exist. I don't think I know you anymore. Someone told me you don't live here. Anymore.

Yours,
Someone Frightened.

Letter day 004
Dear happiness,
When will I see you again?

Yours,
Anyone, really.

Letter day 304
Dear you,

sorry for being so not fun tonight. I myself didn't know who the girl you were calling tonight. Happy 10th month of our togetherness. I love you.

Yours,
Sind.

If I could be somebody for a week. Or forever.

2010-08-16T20:18:00.019+07:00

That would be Olivia Palermo. At all. No doubt. She was born and raised in Upper East Side. A living goddess. Always present in every social event (yang suka Gossip Girl, this is Blair Waldrof in the real life). I described her style as exquisite, always poised and glamorous. I never saw her wearing tacky and dowdy outfits. Her life is nearly perfect. I wonder how will I handle a kind of life like that, huh? *mimisan*

She’s a city day-chick, nonetheless a classy and glamorous lady at night. Stars in the US reality TV hit series ‘The City’. This is a must see if you want girls drama and tons of cat fights. Nevertheless, the clothes and shoes etc, they’re to die for. HA. (Um anyway, ada yang punya DVD The City, gue nggak pernah kesampaian nonton The City marathon).

In my opinion, she’s one of the most charming and beautiful faces in the telly and fashion scene, along sides of Leighton Meester, Blake Lively, Rosie Huntington Whiteley and Jessica Stam etc. Glancing on her facial and body features, she resembles my old time favorite classic actress and fashion icon Audrey Hepburn. But some say Leighton Meester is the new Audrey. For me Olivia stands out more than Leighton. She clearly understood her body type and know how to dress herself. She doesn’t have a fashion stylist as I’ve heard in an interview.

OK, this is one more thing I love about her,
SHE'S WEARING HERMES WITH CONVERSE, GIRLS.

And, she's wearing Mulberry to. *OK, now, I need oxygen*

And, again, she has the eye for fashion and knows her own fashion style. She’s très chic!
This Magazine collage says it all.

Photos from Glamour UK 2010 issue.

And, again and still, the more important part, is that he has a very handsome arm candy by the name of Johannes Huebl!!! After a long surfing, I just found out that Johannes is.... germany TT__TT

∆∆

NOW, LET'S COUNTDOWN TO GOSSIP GIRL SEASON 4!!!!

27 DAYS TO GO!!!!

and, again―swear it's gonna be the last 'and'―anybody buy me Alexa Chung Mulberry bag, yang warna krem please? please? please?

"Happy birthday, Adek. Please don't grow up."

2010-08-15T23:52:00.009+07:00

So my little sister (that just no longer little anymore) turned 16 last Saturday, and we celebrated her birthday dengan buka puasa bareng di Carlo de Huts, Senayan City. Tadinya, gue sama adek maunya Sushi Tei, cuma kakak gue tercinta not in the mood for Sushi katanya. Jadilah kita disini.

Dan, adek gue ntah kenapa rakus banget. Gue mesen Black Papper Pizza tapi gue rasa itu cukup buat 2 sampai 3 orang yang nggak rakus, tapi adek gue mesen fries dan pasta. Trus mba Ra sandwich, trus 1 cheese cake dari mbak Ra as a birthday cake buat adek, dan satu strawberry pancake dari restorannya.

Dan makanannya nggak abis. Sampai 2 jam kita disana, tetep gak abis. And anyways, setelah 5 hari puasa, baru sekali gue buka puasa di rumah. Jadi buat yang ngekos, jangan sedih ya temen-temenku, gue udah nggak buka puasa dengan keluarga penuh sejak 3 tahun lalu. You'll be fine ;)

Happy birthday again adekku sayang! Jangan cepet-cepet jadi besar ya, old people suck :)

How the story begins. How the story ends. And how is life supposed to be.

2010-08-10T08:42:00.005+07:00

Sometimes, people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there―to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become.

You never know who these people may be. But you know, every moment that I am with them, they will affect my life in some profound way. And sometimes, things happen to me at the time that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair, but in reflection I realize that without overcoming those obstacles I would have never realized my potential, strength, will power or heart.

Everything happens for a reason. Repeat, everything happens for a reason. The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create who you are, and the bad experiences can be learned from―In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

Maybe God sent me to my college because God knows that I can't be just one me. I can't stand just one day without talking to Mela. I couldn't be that far away from Denis (Binus is near from Trisakti International Class building, anyway :p) And we're even planning to live in one building. *God, please make it happen.*

I used to be "destroy who destroys you" person. But now, I think if someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.

―And if someone loves you, love them back unconditionally. Not only because they love you, but also because they are teaching you to love and open your heart and eyes to little things.

Let's appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again. Because nothing last forever but memory. Let's make a good memory. For you who still young, set yourself free, make mistakes, break all the rules with your friends, and enjoy the moment. Because one day, you're gonna miss it. Trust me. In the end, everything's just gonna be memory. Everything comes to and end― sadness and happiness.

I wish one day I'd be worthy to anyone. Maybe as a psychologist or just a good mommy. I just don't wanna be forgotten. Please forgive everything I've done. Mohon maaf lahir dan batin, everybody :)

Psychology Freshmen Enrichment 2010

2010-08-06T21:33:00.004+07:00

Finally the freshmen enrichment is over! :D Well, actually tomorrow is the last day of the freshmen enrichment, tapi gue sama mela milih cabut aja cause tomorrow night is our prom night :)

My freshmen enrichment was fun honestly, tapi tetep aja ya bo', capek! I thank God that my college didn't make a rules such as another college made in their freshmen enrichment programs. Nggak banyak yang bisa diceritain, di binus ospeknya tuh formal gitu, nggak ada tugas-tugas, nggak di marah-marahin, udah mulai dikasih gambaran nanti kuliah gimana, trus pendekatan ke mentor-mentor selama 1 tahun, dll. Seragamnya doang sih yang nyebelin, kemeja putih, celana item. Kayak orang kantoran. Ini beberapa fotonya, I didn't bring my camera jadi gambarnya dikit dan seadanya banget. But I hope it's enough for you guys. See ya on Sept 5th! Bakal ada Inagurasi!

Gue sama si kembaran. Gue sama mela dipanggil kembar dempet disini.

Dwi, Tika, Meta, Gue, Mela. Ketinggalan si tante gila Nisa :(

Anyway, mohon maaf lahir batin ya. :)

One minute.

2010-07-30T22:33:00.003+07:00

Me: ...so, how if we're done here, now.
Him: Are you really gonna do this?
Me: You wanted this first! Your jerky friends, they just―you know. So, yeah.
Him: So we're done?
Me: I guess.
Him: And how if I want us to be back again?
Me: Now?
Him: Yes.

So we were off, for one minute.

Palembang, The prom dress, and last week of July

2010-07-28T21:21:00.007+07:00

Ini tambang batu bara di Palembang. Agak nggak maksud juga yah nyokap ngajak kesini. Yah nggak papa gitu kalo tambangnya milik pribadi―amin aja deh :)

So, I'm back, people! Had a boring week at Palembang― no, it REALLY is boring! Plus a big fight with him. Told you july hates me.

But then, I'm back to where my heart is, home :) but just stayed at home for a couple minutes before went out again to Pim, looking for prom dress with Mela. And we found this at Dei Reinch boutique. A new cute boutique (―haven't even a month). Spent about 2 hours there to found the perfect dress and... let it just be surprise at the prom night so I'm not gonna show the dress here ;)

Bolak balik fit baju.

First dress I tried. I tried like... TOO MANY dresses and the final dress is secret ;)

(―OH YEAH, ALMOST FORGET― Selamat 9 bulanan ya Nyis! Don't ask anything about how much I love you. Good night.)

I'm off to Palembang for a week.

2010-07-20T18:02:00.002+07:00

Like I said, my dad moved to Palembang dan bakal sertijab hari Kamis. Because I have nothing to do in Jakarta, I decided buat ke Palembang aja liat upacara serah terima jabatannya bokap (the last time I saw 'sertijab' thingy itu kalau nggak salah pas SD, selebihnya setiap bokap sertijab gue pasti lagi sekolah) Walaupun gue agak takut juga mepet waktunya antara hunting baju prom sama ke Palembang, but prom dress can wait. Dad's ceremony? No. So I just can't wait to see Palembang, I've never been to Palembang before, so it's gonna be the very first time. Super excited!

So... I'll see you soon then. Take care! :)

This Week

2010-07-15T20:53:00.004+07:00

The fact that I'm so sad because World Cup is over is kinda silly. Sampe-sampe Denis bilang, "Aduh Sind, ya masa piala dunia di ulang gara-gara kamu kangen." Tapi emang ngangenin ya suasannya? Apa gue doang lagi? --'

Anyway, just got home after watched Despicable Me 3D with Denis. Dan lagi, karna Denis kalah taruhan atas kemenangan Spanyol, Sushi Tei kali ini dia yang bayar. Hihihi―Well, the movie was so great! Sumpah lucu banget :') Jauh lebih lucu dari Shrek Forever After. Tapi tetep aja yah, pacar saya bobok selama filmnya diputer.

Eh iya, back then again to the soccer thing, gue jadi gila Pique gini deh. So since the very first time I watch Spain, pas dia lawan Swiss, gue nggak naksir sama Torres, langsung naksir sama Pique. Ampun deh brewoknya―YUM!― Trus akhirnya, every time I watched Spain's match I was like, "Itu tuh cowo gue! Liat tuh yang nomer 3, liat, nggak ada yang bisa lewatin dia." And now I'm kinda crazy every time I open my tumblr timeline karna semuanya tentang soccer. Termasuk ini:

I cried. No kidding this is.... touchy. Sumpa Casillas is Goddamn handome. And Gods are used to getting what they want, when they want it. If you’re going to be with Casillas, you better be prepared to deliver, because if he wants to fuck you in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you; you better fuck him in the street while the paparrazzi creeps and films you. HAHAHA ENJOY THIS

Fabrique Bromance (+ Puyol)

2010-07-13T11:48:00.013+07:00

Like most people, I gathered around a big screen television with friends and watched the entire 120 minutes of sometimes boring/sometimes intense the world cup match. But I found this really cute how Cescy, Gery, and Puyi spent much time together. Trus gue cerita sama Denis how I wish Fabregas could be sent to Barca supaya persahabatan mereka makin lucu. Eh malah disambut dengan omelan Denis yang fans berat Arsenal. Trus Denis ngatain Pique, Puyol, Xavi gay, trus gue ngambek. Trus gue melihat banyak tweet yang dari awal banget world cup menyatakan banget they fuck Spain.

To those who think Spain didn’t deserve to reach the finals, I say fuck you.

There’s no denying their talent. They won the European competition back in 2008. They have some of the best players in the world. And they’re... good looking LOL (no homo)!

You can’t compare teams like Spain and Germany. Germany scored more goals obviously, but that’s just the way they play. As soon as Germany score, they are hungry for more. That’s why they end up winning by like, 3 or 4 goals every game they play. Spain does pretty much the opposite. When they score, they tighten the gaps and play actual defense.

Soccer (I’m calling it soccer. Calling it football is too confusing.) doesn’t need to have high scoring games. That isn’t what this sport is about. Who cares if Spain won the majority of their games 1-0?

A win is a win.

Credit to the Netherlands for playing in some of the most exciting games of the competition. But I honestly wanted Spain to win their first world cup. And they did just that.

GO ESPANA! AND CESCY FABREGAS. AND GERY PIQUE. AND CARLY PUYI :)

Look, how cute Puyi do that 'peace' sign.Being chairmate on the way to South Africa
And still chairmate when way back to Spain.LOL Puyi is texting. I desperately wish that somebody give me Pique's blackberry's pin.
His Javelin just so exist!
SUPERSUPERSUPERCUTE

GOD THIS IS SO CUTE I CAN'T BREATH.

"On the pitch I’ve learned a lot from Pique. And also about life in general. He has a smile on his face the whole day." - Puyol.

P.S My tumblr looks like soccer tumblr now. LOL― I just can't wait for 4 years later. Anybody buy me a ticket to Brazil? PLEASE?!

MANY CONGRATULATIONS, SIR.

2010-07-12T08:39:00.012+07:00

Ignore about good sentence in this post. I just can't help my self to not posting this post soon (especially, the video!)― So I watched the final of World Cup 2010 with Denis at Blitz Pacific Place. Dua hari sebelum final, tiap hari kerjaan gue sama Denis cuma debat soal siapa yang bakal menang, Denis megang Belanda karna memang jagoan dia selain Spanyol itu Belanda, gue megang Spanyol, tetep. Trus pas mau nobar, Denis nggak mau pake Jersey Spain, tapi gue paksa: 1) Pasang tampang melas, 2) Ngomong, "Yah, aku sendirian dong..."

Trus dia mau pake jersey Spain, tapi dukung Netherlands. Ha.

Trus sepanjang pertandingan kita adu debat, dan pas Iniesta bikin goal, Denis kicep. Baru dia bilang, "Belanda emang kalah di skill, Sind. Tapi aku bela dia karna aku suka semangatnya." Fine, the reason is accepted. Trus dia nepatin janji, yang kalah yang bayar bill makan di sushi tei nanti. Hihihi. Lengkap, selama piala dunia, alhamdulillah gak pernah kecewa karna negara yang gue dukung menang terus. YEAY!

Lanjut,
Selesai nobar tuh udah jam 4.30 kan, dasarnya gue sama Denis nggak suka makan―apalagi Denis nggak biasa sarapan, kita nyari coffee shop, I bought hot tea and chocolate doughnut, denis cukup dengan hot black coffe, yuck. Trus kita parkir depan sekolah, tidur bentar nungguin anak-anak, trus ngambil buken, baru balik ke rumah masing-masing. Herannya, nggak ngantuk.

ANYWAY, YOU (100 PERCENT) HAVE TO SEE THIS.

BRB JEALOUS. REPEAT, BRB JEALOUS.

Download:

FLV MP4 3GP

Healing.

2010-07-10T21:13:00.001+07:00

We never really know people. Even those we share a pillow with every night. At the end of the day, nobody knows anyone.

See how this supercute man loves to jump! :)

2010-07-10T21:07:00.005+07:00

SUPER SUPER SUPERCUTE

Sleep tight, Spain...

2010-07-08T05:02:00.010+07:00

It's now 5:19 o'clock in the very morning, I just came back from Citos for Nonton Bareng Spain Vs. Germany. I guess it's the best night of world cup 2010. Rame deh, nontonya bareng adek gue (Ayu), kakaknya Denis (Mbak De), pacarnya kakaknya Denis (Suban), temen pacar kakaknya Denis(Unknown), sepupunya Denis (Sheila), Arli, Wandy, and of course, Denis :D

Honestly, as I came with Spain Jersey, gue udah nyiapin syal, dan Denis udah prepared jaket kalau seandainya Spanyol kalah. Seriously man, German was asshole. They got 4 for both of England and Argentina.

But... as you may have known this... Spain... is... going... to... THE FINAL!!!!

Can you even believe? HA! I love Spain 'till death. Dan pas Puyol-sweet-heart finally made a goal, gue jingkrak-jingkrak, every body in Citos made sounds like HELL YEAH, semua orang berdiri, teriak, hugging, kissing, dan sangking excited-nya, gue pelukan aja gitu sama Denis.... trus cipika cipiki sama Kakak cewenya Denis.

And... as you may have known this too, I love Netherlands too. So, who ever is gonna be the winner later, that's OK, both of them are my favorite. The more important thing is, again, bisa nontong bareng lagi. Kali ini nggak bakal pake deg-degan. But I guess, I'm gonna wear Netherlands jersey. Hehehe... Idk. Just. Keep. Watching ;)

Introduce you, this is Sheila, sepupunya Denis dari Bandung :)

HAVE A NICE DAY CASILLAS, PIQUE, VILLA, RAMOS, ....and finally PUYOL (o' yes, you're now my fav too, P) Sleep tight, rest much, you guys did the best! Hugs from me ({}) ({}) ({})

Ini foto-foto yang baru bisa diupload sekarang karna baru di tag-tagin hihi:

Gue, Sheila, Mba De

Adek, Denis, Arli.

Old notes.

2010-07-05T22:00:00.005+07:00

In this world, there's so much of what looks like love, and sounds like love, and calls itself love, but it isn't. It's just people saying and doing what they think they ought to say and do. Loving someone despite what people think is fearless. Love is about trusting our feelings and taking chances, losing and finding happiness, appreciating the memories and learning from the past. Love is about respecting others.

But it was always been up to you. And the world spins madly on. And no one really knows our heartaches. And, you really wanna know what love is?

Love is all. It gives all, and it takes all.

Love,
Snd.

Jakarta again.

2010-07-04T21:09:00.006+07:00

Hi there everyone, just came back from Medan. Had 3 super fun days. And didn't bring my camera, and didn't even take any picture ;) Nggak ada rencana sih, tiba-tiba disuruh pack baju-baju. Dan sampai sana juga cuma wisata kuliner. But God bless me, berat nggak nambah alhamdulillah. Dan sepadat apapun jadwal disana, tetep jam 9 gue harus di lounge hotelnya, bodo amat nyokap masih mau makan-makan, gue nonton bola :D

So, Spain bakal lawan German. Fuck Deddy Corbuzier, what fucking ever he said, tetep Spain deh menang kalah. Please, nanti filnya Netherlands sama Spain aja. God, please?

Love,
Me

Football isn't my thing. Handsome is :p

2010-06-30T20:36:00.003+07:00

And that's why these happen :p

SPAIN AND NETHERLANDS FOR WORLD CUP 2010

You should watch this video. This is freaking funny.

2010-06-29T14:36:00.004+07:00

I found this from tumblr and I was like watch it all over again. Fucking funny. My fav part? When Rooney looks so damn ridiculous and when Iniesta, Fabregas, and Pique trowing the newspaper. SUPER CUTE!

Download:

FLV MP4 3GP

June 29th

2010-06-29T02:27:00.006+07:00

Not so a nice night for both of us. But I know you love me and you know I love you. That's more than just, "Happy the 8th month of the togetherness..." We still have the whole day by tomorrow though. So good night sleepy head, just reply my message as soon as you can. I love you.

P.S I know that saying "I love you" so many times would be disgusting but I just can't hold my lips to say again, I love you. Repeat again, I love you. And, love you.

―I love you. Oops.

It's always been you, Dad...

2010-06-27T13:58:00.010+07:00

So yes, my dad's moving to Palembang as a new Komandam Korem or Danrem there. You know what, when I was a little, what in my mind was, "Danrem itu tua banget.." And when I look at my dad, yes he is now old. And I am too. Or― now I'm an adult.

I also called him when I had that fucking failed hair cut, and he was like, "Nggak pa-pa.. nanti 3 bulanan lagi udah panjang.. Jangan nangis lagi ya..." I feel like, damn, I'm going to college this year tapi kelakuan gue masih aja like his little girl.

I've had the responsibility since I was 15 when my dad told me to live alone in Jakarta without him because he must moved to Kediri as a Danbrig. I employ a lot of people, I make a lot of adult decisions, and that has forced me to grow up a little faster. And also missed his 'getting-old' moments.

You're now commander and I'm a college girl, daddy. I swear to God I'll always be your little girl till I death. I love you. I love you. I love― and so proud of you.

And this is, my fav song since elementary. The perfect song for the perfect dad. And what makes this funny, dulu pas kelas 5 SD, gue suka nangis sendiri di kasur sambil dengerin ini lagu. Gila, I've been so drama queen since young. HA.

I remember.. When you used to take me on a bike ride every day on the bayou. And I remember.. When you could do no wrong. You come home from work and I jump in your arms when I saw you. I was so happy to see you.. Because you loved me, I overcome. And I'm so proud of what you've become. You've given me such security. No matter what mistakes I make you're there for me. You cure my disappointments and you heal my pain. You understood my biz and you protected me. I treasure every year in place a comemory

Reff:
And that's why I want my unborn son.. to be like my daddy. I want my husband to be like my daddy. There is no one else like my daddy. And I thank you for loving me. Daddy daddy daddy..

I still remember the expression your face when you found out I'd been on a date and had a boyfriend. I still remember I called you crying cause of my tattoo coulda said "Beyonce I told you," So instead you said you'd get one too. Words cant express my boundless gratitude for you. I appreciate what you do.. You've given me tight security. No matter what mistakes I know you're there for me. Cut my disappointments and heal my pain. You understood by biz and you protected me. I treasure every extraordinary memory, that's why..

(Reff)

Even if a man broke my heart today. No matter how much pain I'm in I would be OK. Cause I got a man in my life that can't be replaced. His love is unconditional. It won't go away. And I know I'm lucky. Know it aint easy. Men who take care of their responsibilities. Love is overwhelming? Stop a tear from falling. I love you so much daddy... Thank you..

You've done so much for me.
I love you,
Daddy.

(I was a punk baby, wasn't I? Ha. I know it's kinda way TOO late but, happy fathers day, Dad. You are the best daddy in the world. I always thank God that I'm your daughter.)

I'm so emotional daddy.. Every time I think of you.. I get emotional daddy.. Every time I think of you.. There is no one else like my daddy.. No one will replace my daddy.. Daddy daddy daddy daddy..

Hair.

2010-06-27T06:24:00.008+07:00

So, I cut my hair last night. Gue bilang sama mas-masnya, pengen yang atas aja yang dipotong supaya punya model lagi dan agak naik, gue nggak mau rambut bawah gue dipotong berapa incipun. Harusnya, dia udah bisa ngira-ngira dong, rambuh bawah gue segini, so he should cut like this, or that, or blah. Eh dia malah langsung aja motong seenak jidatnya jadi...
Bercanda. Itu depannya. Belakangnya masih penjang sih, tapi di potong dua senti. And I cried, in front of him. I'm not a type of person who could hold my tears, lagian emang gue―gimana yah, I wasn't ready to a new hair cut di rambuh bawah even for a little shorter. Jadi trus yang bawah dipotong 2 senti. Dia ngakunya enggak, but I know! For God's sake this is my hair, and I count it every day dan gue tau kalau panjangnya udah se-udel. Jadi sampe rumah gue nangis lagi lebih kejer. Rambut gue bukan termasuk yang cepet panjang, so I have to wait a very long time to get my hair back.
Ini rambut gue kalau tampak belakang. Nggak ada bedanya yah, ada tau, banyak. I know this long, but I'm a very long hair people. Oh and, I called my mom, cried again like a newborn baby, hope she allow me to have a little extension. Kalau nggak di bolehin, nangis lagi aja ah yang kenceng, she should know what I feel soalnya dia juga nangis pas rambutnya dipotong kependekan, trus dia juga did extension buat rambutnya. So she should let me do this.

P.S Sorry kalau fotonya kayak nggak ready banget gitu, I planned to take my photo this morning tapi mata gue bengkak jadi pakai foto yang gue kirim ke Denis dan Mela, dan gue merem karna matanya merah. Ha.

OH AND AGAIN― my father is gonna move to Palembang.

A necklace for mommy...

2010-06-25T23:31:00.006+07:00

I thank God that my Mom loves fashion as much as I do. She was the biggest supporter of mine and always respect to all my work. And whenever I have a bad mood, she come to me and bring all the cute stuff and say, "What can you do with this stuff? Hit it."
And I did it. But I feel like this is a lil bit 'alay'. So I give it to my mom and she was like, "Ah suka banget..." Oh well, ini nggak alay, tapi selera ibu-ibu.

Oh iya, Denis is home, finally. Dia harus nunggu deker besinya ready dulu before got home. Aaaaanndd, who did watch Spain this early morning? Supercool, yang ganteng-ganteng maju semua. Uuuuu, suka banget. What a huge score― 2-1! Yeay.

Much love,
S.

LYNX AND DELILAH AND LYNX AND DELILAH

2010-06-24T14:42:00.006+07:00

So, tomorrow was a fairy tale. We colored our nails and took zillios photos. We also wore our twins clothes....

… and being angle for each other...

...and being monster to each other...

...and laughing at each other...
...and took a picture of each other...
...this too.
And tried every colored gel filter...
...this is too.
...and sprucing each other

...and sharing candy, and floral dresses...
...and jumpsuit...
....also sharing ice cream.

♥

Get Well Super Soon, Bunnie..

2010-06-23T20:39:00.005+07:00

Denis sama Arli, pacar kedua Denis yang suka berantem sama gue rebutan Denis tiap malem Minggu.

So, my boy friend just got a surgery on his knee. Nggak ngerti juga kakinya kenapa, yang jelas gara-gara main futsal deh trus cedera trus gak bisa jalan trus di oprasi. Hahahaha.

(ini chat-an a month ago, waktu pertama kali cedera dan dia nggak
tau kalau akhirnya harus oprasi)

Ini pasukan hari ini yang jenguk! Arli, Meldy, Denis, Gue, Hana, Anggo.

dan Angga.

dan dua orang yang gila banget difoto.

Gapapa yah Nyis aku upload yang ini muka kamu gak abstrak-abstrak banget kok ;)

Go home soon, Nyis.. :)

To My Dearest Trente Neuf, please listen.. :)

2010-06-20T14:57:00.009+07:00

Those schoolgirl days, of telling tales and biting nails are gone. But in my mind, I know they will still live on and on. But how do you thank someone, who has taken you from crayons to perfume? It isn't easy, but I'll try.

If you wanted the sky I would write across the sky in letters, that would soar a thousand feet high. To Sir, with Love.

The time has come for closing books and long last looks must end. And as I leave, I know that I am leaving my best friend. A friend who taught me right from wrong. And weak from strong, that's a lot to learn. What can I give you in return?

If you wanted the moon I would try to make a start. But I, would rather you let me give my heart.
To Sir, with Love

:)

2010-06-20T03:31:00.002+07:00

Just got home after had a Nonton Bareng Piala Dunia sama Denis. And I just remember that I've finished watching Glee part 2

The final episode is just beautiful :) If the 1st part was about winning everything, the 2nd part is about being grateful of everything, though you lose. The Glee club lost in the sectional. But that's pretty fair tho, nggak seru juga kan kalau ending-nya selalu menang karna memang Glee is not better that Jessie's group. ―And oh yeah, I watched The A Team too. Ya, ampun kalau yang ini juara deh bagus banget :)

Thanks for tonight, Nyis. I actually wished that somebody could stop the moon from the falling down cause I had fun! ;)
Goodnight!

Forever is Never.

2010-06-19T12:46:00.003+07:00

I used to think about forever. But it was. Before times teach time that everything is going to an end. Dulu, pas denger kalau nanti di surga kita bakal satu umur semua, gue rasanya pengen nangis deh. Hahaha, I feel like, how if my parents didn't know me.

But that's probably just a dumb-teenage-girl-ness.

Jadi sudah lah, tumbuh dewasa itu bukan kata-kata, tunjukkan dengan sikap. I'm starting my new chapter in my life, so please don't talk anything again about past. Kami sudah tidak pernah membicarakan kita lagi, kami bahkan sudah tidak memikirkan kamu, atau kita lagi. So, stop it. We're not gonna hurt you no more. You know me well. I will always try.

A week in Semarang.

2010-06-18T17:51:00.004+07:00

Jadi kan awal pertengarah Mei kemarin gue ke Semarang kan? Trus janji mau upload foto-foto selama disana. So here they are...

Hiburan di perjalanan. I bought every magazine yang ada liputannya tentang Sex and The City. One of them itu Cosmopolitan yang covernya si Sarah Jessica Parker and I swear to God ini majalah isinya dewasa semua.

Chloe!! Temen satu lagi selama di perjalanan kemanapun di Semarang :) I was like a mommy!

The only reason berat badan jadi 46 :(

Percaya apa enggak, di rumah bokap gue isi VCD-nya film-film beginian. See, how my dad loves tales too.

Nyobain footspa for the 1st time with mommy and dauty :)

“Go for it now. The future is promised to no one.” - Graduation.

2010-06-15T19:04:00.007+07:00

I don't know what to tell, may these photos tell you more...

"Nobody takes pictures of something they want to forget..."

Love,
Your friend, your enemy, your frenemy,

Your Nda.

Your Sind.

Tumblr, Twitter, wtv,

2010-06-14T19:01:00.005+07:00

I don't feel like tweeting lately. I hate my timeline. And I can't write as much as I want, and also with blog. And also I don't put follow-bar here, so if you want to know about me more, just check my tumblr, OK?

http://sindahadiwiguno.tumblr.com/

Thanks,
Love you.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
GO!CURRY Restaurant with M.

So I watched Sex and The City for the second time with M. I really don't mind, it's not about the film, it's about quality time. We talked about M's new boy. And you know what? HE REALLY IS LIKE DENIS AT ALL, FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!

I mean, the hair style, the smile, and... THEIR BEHAVIOR!!!

So, here are the pictures...

M with her curry.

My meal. They named it something but I think it's just kind kebab tapi enak banget deh. You should try one.

-------------
Anyway, can somebody tell me how to work the new template? I just don't get them :p

do-it-yourself accessories

2010-06-06T22:50:00.006+07:00

Hi!

Been so long since I posted the D-I-Y accessories, to reminds you, just click this and this. But finally I did this again today. Lemme show you...

Ini gelang dan Cicin yang asal muasalnya tuh KANCING BAJU.

Ini calon-calon D-I-Y berikutnya. Ada yang mau? Bilang aja kalo mau di bikinin ;)

Ini kalung-kaling yang gue bikin

And,
this is me, wearing my D-I-Y necklace.

Ayo, show me yours!
Xx

LOOK!LET!

2010-06-05T21:35:00.008+07:00

Looklet - Lynx

Looklet - Pretty Rock$tar

boring as hell trus akhirnya mainan looklet. Mampir ke looklet gue yuk, sekalian gimme many many heart here... SindaHadiwiguno's Looklet

Fridays, 4th of June 2010

2010-06-04T21:01:00.006+07:00

So I watched Sex And The City 2 today with Denis, and Denis' sister, and Denis' sister's boyfriend―ouh yeap, so called double date! And a night before I watch the movie, I was like, "Gosh! Can't wait, can't wait, 100 times can't wait!" and when the Empire State Of Mind song playing in the beginning of the movie I was like, "Oh, my God, THAT New York! THAT New York! That Carrie's New York!"

but...

this film surprisingly not as oh-my-fucking-god-I-could-kill-anyone-to-be-one-of-them as the 1st film. I mean, yeah, they're fabulous but, I honestly expected more drama. It's Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda for NewYork's sake. Even the Manolo shoes doesn't really as everywhere as in the 1st movie! But yeah, the Louboutin shown up in the beginning, but that's not enough! Their shoes used to blow our eyes for Blahnik's sake... Gosh, I think I'm gonna watch the 1st movie tonight.

But by the way, I just had a buku kenangan photo shoot with Mela and others and that was quite fun. That went super fast! Done at 10 am, could you even believe?! And... this is one of the photo.

Thanks for Prili! God bless your camera! :D

June Post.

2010-06-03T02:08:00.005+07:00

Hi there everyone! Just came back from the holiday and didn't bring much story though. All I bring now is just one feeling, I miss him! And so sorry couldn't upload the pictures now, I don't know where the hell is the phone cable. So just gonna show you my latest photo till now.

Me. Wearing Spain Football Jersey. #1 Note: Ini nggak beli dari Kokoh Angga lho, because as you can see, it's the women jersey, and Angga only sell for the men. It's from Denis anyway, #2 Note: I didn't ask him to buy me one. He was just, "This. I want you to have my World Cup hero Jersey."

How cute?
Iya, I mean the t-shirt and story, bukan muka gue.
So, let's counting down to the World Cup!
Cheers!

Gonna spend these last days of May with my girlfriend.

2010-05-27T05:00:00.003+07:00

So I watched Shrek Forever After with Denis yesterday. Trus karna dia udah mau gue ajak nonton 'film gue'―FYI: tadinya Denis nggak mau nemenin gue nonton karna dia males nonton kartun― gantian gue yang nonton 'film dia', Prince Of Persia. Kalau Denis ketiduran nonton Shrek. Gue ketiduran nonton Prince Of Percia.

Tapi nggak papa, berarti kita seri. Trus we grabbed some dinner at sushi tei, Denis bilang, he's going to Bandung sama Arli this weekend. And am thinking to catch my lil girlfriend yang lagi ada di Jogja.

And here I am, just finished Sahur and packing. So gonna fly to Jogja this afternoon just to meet my baby Melo. Wish you have a wonderful weekend to. I'll see ya!

Love,

2010-05-24T05:29:00.002+07:00

Nooooooooooo! Me and my boy friend are sooooo fine! Unbelievably fine! The whole sad-posts aren't about me and Denis. We're so going to having our 7th month celebration. So wish us the best and having fun, people!

P.S I really wish you also pray for me about my UMB result. Seriously, will really really appreciate it and God will always bless us :) Amin.

Times.

2010-05-23T17:01:00.003+07:00

I've been telling my boyfriend this, "Aku pengen jadi kecil lagi, Nyis." like for hundred times.

Being adult is just... being in so many problems. Trouble loved me, it was always been fun. But problems?
But then, the clock is still ticking. And I got it. The real pain killer is TIME. Time gives us memory, time gives us future. Time gives us hopes. Time makes some people better. Time makes some people worse.

Being wild or sweet, both are fun.

When we get older, we will be stronger. And I really want to see you in future. As a happy person. And... thank you. Thanks for the memories, thanks for every advice you gave to me. That was amazing. Still amazing to remember. And I might forget the world that I knew, but I swear I won't forget you :)

"I could love you again, but I don't think I want to." -Circle of Friends (1995)

2010-05-19T23:20:00.001+07:00

To answer the question "Why did I shut my mouth up all this time?" It was because I held my self to not hurt you.

We need to gave us more silent and introspection. But while I was doing those stuff, while I was really missing you, while I really wanted to say sorry, I saw and I heard so many things you've done.

You've done too much to revenge. And it all hurts. You tried to hurt me while I tried to not. And you so got that.

I've hurt you. I know.

But she has hurt us. Hurt our dads. The corruptors scandal, remember?

A very strong revenge. A very strong pain.

So the angels aren't crying anymore. But the devil are laughing in a party, can you hear that?

I CAN'T WAIT THIS ANY LONGER!!!

2010-05-18T08:54:00.003+07:00

SEX AND THE CITY 2

Apathy; Pretty little thing.

2010-05-17T19:31:00.008+07:00

I began when someone asked me,

"Are you really a sweet girl inside?"

A million rupiahs question. I mean, it's me you ask. Maybe most of you will--instantly--scream, "NO! ONE THOUSAND PERCENT NO." Back then, I ask you back.

"Are we really all sweet girls inside?"

No, sweety.
Everyone has one black side and one white side. I know maybe some of you never tried use your black side--atau, gagal dalam menggunakannya. But, at least, I've tried to be sweet. If you see me 2 years ago--gosh, I sometimes miss that times-- I never used my white side.

Never with anyone but my friends.

Day by day, I'm thinking of it. The man you're dating now, is the man that used to called 'the one'.

But, how many 'the one' have you had?

One? Two? Five? Twenty?
Don't try too hard to be someone else. Just be a bitch. The boy you're dating now, he is NOT your future husband. The best friend you're hugging right now, she is NOT your future neighbour.

I started to build everything at 15, the dreams I had when I was kid, I didn't really remember them again, that time. So many people talked about their dreams and shared, and I brought my new dreams, that time.

I stop by the age 18. When, everyone has reached their dreams one by one. Then I remember about my old dreams. Those are simple. Those are nice. Those are... Godness.

I really hate growing up. Being adult is just... bitch. Sweet girls do exist. Sweet woman? Knock the heaven's door later, you might find them there.

P.S To all dearest freshman, just enjoy the moment of real God's life--in the first place God made idiots--high school :)

When you tired and not shining anymore. When you want to fly to leave me. When the fairy tale is come to an end, and the journey is over.

2010-05-16T11:44:00.007+07:00

Sahabat sejatiku, hilangkah dari ingatanmu di hari kita saling berbagi? Dengan kotak sejuta mimpi, aku datang menghampirimu, kuperlihat semua hartaku. Kita s’lalu berpendapat, kita ini yang terhebat. Kesombongan di masa muda yang indah. Aku raja kaupun raja. Aku hitam kaupun hitam. Arti teman lebih dari sekedar materi

Pegang pundakku, jangan pernah lepaskan. Bila ku mulai lelah… lelah dan tak bersinar. Remas sayapku, jangan pernah lepaskan. Bila ku ingin terbang… terbang meninggalkanmu.

Ku s’lalu membanggakanmu, kaupun s’lalu menyanjungku. Aku dan kamu darah abadi. Demi bermain bersama, kita duakan segalanya. Merdeka kita, kita merdeka.

Tak pernah kita pikirkan. Ujung perjalanan ini. Tak usah kita pikirkan. Akhir perjalanan ini.

(block if you want to see)

....the nights are gone and here come the new sun, gift from heaven and today's talks

2010-05-15T23:25:00.003+07:00

I was always asking God, why do all good things come to an end?

I got nightmares almost every night last week, wake up every hour, felt worst, can't sleep, and stuff, and stuff. But then, back to what always I say when I'm down, "Good times, bad times, just enjoy it."

So I just walked dengan semangat dan orang-orang yang masih tersisa. Then I found the answer for what I've been asking...

It's not how good things went away.
It's how better things come away.

I spent this night with Mel and Denis. We talked about things. We might not special. We might not that smart. But we're always home. We're always feeling homey. We know who we should talk to. We deal that no one is perfect.

Then, my relationship with my older sister is going good. People are right, gue mungkin satu-satunya orang di dunia ini yang tidak bisa hidup sendiri. I finally talk to my sister when I didn't know who I should talk with. I still have my amazing family. And the other family--I heard many good advice from Mel's sister, met Mel's brother tonight, I'm having a good relationship and many plans with D's family.

So, here I tell you, whenever you're down, just hold on. Don't talk to anyone that couldn't be trust-worthy. Don't talk to people who may be on your side but don't know the real problem. Don't talk to anyone that even has hurt you. Hold on. Just hold yourself on. Be calm. Introspection. Enjoy the pain. But honestly, I didn't enjoy the pain yesterday, jujur, gue mati rasa. No pain, no happiness, no normal feeling too. Nothing. Seriously, I didn't know what to do, what to say, I just keep walked.

But God sent me here, to new hope, new family, new home, new relationship, new me, new life.

Pitbull

2010-05-13T01:51:00.004+07:00

Will you be okay if I scream, "OH MY FUCKING LORD, HE'S SO FUCKING HOT, AND HANDSOME, AND STUFF!!!"?
I did do that. Gosh, he's sexy. He was wearing hot grey suit. Seriously, I can't describe. All I did were screamed and danced. Dancing like crazy. Dancing like fucking all the things.

Well, today wasn't just about Pitbull. I met M, and we talked. About things. And all the things are just happening with us now are basically like another things before.

Not gonna tell you those things. But finally I can smile. After like bad days before. Now I'm just fine. Thanks to M and Pitbull. And Denis. For be here for the first time for me and really helped.

Thanks to say, "Everything's just gonna be okay," to me when someone who usually says that decided to be gone and I was like, what now?
But then, thanks too to say, "You better sleep now. Things are going okay in the morning. I know you're not okay when first time I saw you today, so, I bet tomorrow will be at least better."

And here I am.
Better.

The last picture before go to bed.
Good night everyone. Have a nice sleep. God bless you all :)

Saturday, 1:28am

2010-05-08T01:25:00.000+07:00

Hi blog.
I can't sleep. I miss everyone. The only man I wish I could talk to is sleeping right now. And we haven't been talking normally for 3 days.

The last 2 days were like the very hard days. I just realized that good day flies so fast, but the bad day..

And by the way, my nose just can't stop bleeding. I'm 38-something degrees right now. Better than last afternoon. I still can't feel my feet. Yeah, I really don't feel like alive. I'm kind of a dead-human.

The result of SIMAK UI will be declared today. I'll be just hoping that J gets what she wants.

Dear Myself,

2010-05-07T08:57:00.002+07:00

You've been working soooo hard to keep everything in their place. You've been trying all the time to make everyone you love happy. Do ever ask yourself, are you happy?

Yes. You're happy if they're happy.
But, have ever let them sad cause yourself is tired to make them happy? Do ever let everything is just gone? Do you ever take a break?

No.

You should learn to be more single-hearted, single-eyed, single-minded. Jay is right, you won't die if everything is gone. Crying less. Breathing more.

Do you remember the last time you crying so hard till you forgot to take a breath? Yes. When you were kid. But you did that yesterday. On your mommy's shoulder. And the only word your mom said is just,

"Breath."

So breath. Let everything will be. You will just sad. Just sad. Like always.

Do you read my blog too, God?

2010-05-06T19:32:00.000+07:00

God, today was the worst day I ever had. I even asked myself, did I ever forget to say thanks to you every day?

God, I know and I believe that you can take anything I have anytime. But I know and I believe too that if I thank you more, you'll give me more. Or at least keep what I thank to you.

God, I don't know whether I could take these anymore or not. Every second today, I wish to you, could you please take me back to 6 years ago? Or, 3 years ago?

God, I hate being me today.

"You'll always be a part of me. I'm part of you indefinitely."

2010-05-01T22:06:00.001+07:00

Nobody can possibly imagine how bad/good my boyfriend in romantic-things. But, you might have heard this, "Romantic guys is not always funny. But funny man is always romantic." And I couldn't agree more :)

I feel soooooooooo blessed that I can be me. So blessed to heard you said, "To be honest, when I asked you to be mine, I didn't think that it's gonna be worked on us. But then yeah, I was wrong. And I love you."

"Since when?"
"What?"
"Since when you love me then?"
"Since... I don't know. All I know is, this' growing strong. Like, I just knowing that now I'm loving you."

I tell you this, it feels so damn great when he said, "It's like now, there's no day without you." I'm blessed for being a part of his days. His every day.

Terima kasih, Nyis.
Love,
Something for someone.

"Once Upon a Time...."

2010-04-29T18:43:00.004+07:00

"......and here they come again.
Another Twenty Nine. For the 6th time.
Then she's loving him still... after all these times."

Name that

2010-04-28T22:56:00.003+07:00

I'm like, "O my God, O my God, tomorrow is 29!" Hahahaha maybe some of you will call me hyper-reaction or something, but I do excited about it.

And by the way, I just realized that my fairy tale has no name. It's just call "Fairy tale." So then..., we're gonna make it now! How about "Thursday"?

Because... well, Thursday was the day when everything was started. So yeah, I'm so gonna tell you Thursday story by tomorrow. Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love you!

She just need to be appreciated.

2010-04-27T11:34:00.004+07:00

What you always think is, that so many girls like me, like her, like another. But I really have to tell you that some people are irreplaceable. And that's why I'm keeping you all this time, because I just don't want to regret anything. I know everyone is different and I'm not gonna find another you.

Me is me. You're not gonna find another me.

I sometimes ask to myself, who the hell are you? Changed me into the weakest girl I've ever known. And sometime I wonder, when the hell am I going to give up? There are so much times when I'm like standing on the line between giving in or seeing how much more I could stand. I neven think to give up. And you, for a thousand times, do that.

Do I really need to tell you?
Darling, when she's mad, all she wants just you're begging her for apology.

The fireworks begin today. Each diploma is a lighted match. Each one of you is a fuse.

2010-04-26T23:45:00.001+07:00

Alhamdulillah gue lulus. Dan juga Bepe. Masih inget Bepe nggak? Rasanya lebih lega denger Bepe lulus daripada kelulusan sendiri. Rasanya lebih terharu. Dan alhamdulillah IPS SMAN 39 peringkat 1 se-DKI Jakarta lagi.

I don't really that excited. I love being a student. It feels like, sekarang gue tua banget. Hahaha well, nggak banyak yang bisa gue report. You know, everybody just talking about this day. And I had fun today. Just spent about 30 minutes at school before went to Astri's house. Abis itu BL class sama jay, ended by di jemput sama Denis tiba-tiba :-)

And maybe I'll post something on Thursday. That'd be the 6th of my 29. Ya ampun, excited! Tapi, toh sekarang Denisnya lagi ngambek, jadi agak ngaruh ke mood nulis gue.

Good night, then :-)

I need about an hour to think about the title of this post, and I decide it has no name ;p

2010-04-21T21:47:00.002+07:00

Ibu gue nyuruh les nih. Jadi kan memang gue libur sampe Agustusan gitu yah, trus dia memberikan dua option:

Les make up lagi
Les motong rambut

Nyokap gue mau nyuruh gue jadi petugas salon mungkin yah. Tapi sebenernya gue pengen banget les masak atau taking a part time job. Atau mungkin cuma nge-gym tiap hari sama Jay buat persiapan prom. Hahaha.

If you were me, kalian bakal ngambil option yang mana?

P.S Whoever wrote: "Your life is perfect. Very perfect," in my chatbox, thank you. Maybe it is. I hope it is :) And gonna share you the newest photo on April...,

Gonna miss you Social 3

"Someone told me this last night..."

2010-04-21T12:46:00.007+07:00

"You're so lucky, Nda. Your life seems so perfect, especially for those silly people. You're dating the most wanted boy in school, you're friends of two coolest girls in school. So, some adore you, some hate you. Some wanna be you, some wanna be like anybody who ignore you."

Thank you for told me that. Thank you for reminding me to be more grateful.
Alhamdulillah.

OMEGLE!

2010-04-20T19:19:00.007+07:00

Gue baru tau yang namanya Omegle itu baru-baru ini. Like 3 days ago. Dan kata Mela gue basi banget. Oke then, lucu-lucu banget. As I'm in the very long holiday, ini sangat membantu. It's like,

or like,
and this,

Tapi, gobloknya, bisa aja terjadi kayak gini... dari 3700an orang yang online,
nggak sampe disitu,

Andira, temen sekelasnya si Mela. Trus yauda lanjut, karna pengen memperbagus english kita, gue jadi Bule nya, Indira orang indonesia-nya.